Mrs. Gleason, I Love Technology, too!

As Katie said today, "I love technology..." As much as I hate how numb-headed it can make me sometimes, where I then resolve to myspace/facebook/cyworld fasting because I find myself plastered to the screen, browsing through pictures and comments and junk for hours on end, I still love that technology allows me to talk on SKYPE.COM to my friends who are far far away, as I did today with Katie, and as I did on Sunday with Ruth. I love run-on sentences, too.

Maybe one day we will all live in this one village where our kids will be running around eating each others' cookies and painting each others' faces. Maybe. Man, that would be marvelous. Gabe, Nicole's baby, would marry one of my daughters and make beautiful bronzed babies. And we mommas/grannies would be fit and trim because we'd go for runs and marathons together. We'd make a large home for children who needed a safe place to paint, sing, write, and be loved on, and we'd do this together. There would be none of this gnawing missing feeling...we'd be building our lives together as we had once tried to seal with a seemingly stabilizing pact.

Well, life happens as it happens. And here we are, some still single, some still in school, some newlywed, some sick, some well, some thriving, separating, thinking, child-rearing, etc etc. All the people that I wish were near me today seem to be scattered all over everywhere, living lives that we all have to live and commit to for now. And I'd say it's a dung-like, shitty place to be sometimes, but I know that for now, it's also the kind of lives we must live and be faithful to. I do believe, as I know my favorite people believe, that one day these dreams of community can and will be ones we'll dream of while still awake, but for now, this'll do. And technology is our toy to play with, together.

But I gotta lay off on the numbing hours in front of this iBook (aka, laptop), for I have some projects to get to...

Starting from September, I will be working part-time in order to have extra time and energy to work on some projects that have been flipping around in my head and heart for quite a while now. I have no idea how long it'll take to complete, nor can I confidently say that it will ever really be completed, but I know I've made the right decision for myself to begin transferring these pieces of me into art forms. There are voices still giving me doubts about whether it is the wisest decision for me to do this now, but I have to listen to what my heart is saying because I've been shutting it up for a long time and I feel like I'm not living the truth. So here begin my adventures and I know this can't be done on my own.

So I pray and I pray. God, will you help me tell your truth. Of who you are, through what you've done in me, what you've done in those closest to me, what you've done in all parts of the world, all that you do now, and every single promise you will keep. Let me tell your story through the story you've given to me. Bare. As is.